Sweet Baby,

Where has the time gone?  I've been carrying you around for 20 (almost 21) weeks now.  It seemed we would never reach this point, now it's here and I have absolutely no idea how it happened.  It seems like just yesterday I was telling your Daddy that we were expecting a baby!  I love having you with me.  I love that I can feel you.  About 5 minutes ago you decided to have a poking session with me.  I would poke you, and you would kick me back.  It went on for a good minute. You are currently kicking just to the left of my belly button.  You are so fun! I wouldn't mind if you kicked all day long! I love those little love taps (: It reminds me that you are alive, active and in good physical condition.  Sometimes... I think it's your way of telling me you love me..

Mother's day was this last Sunday.  It was a special day for me.  I got to reflect on a lot of things.  One of my biggest questions of the day was; Am I a Mother or not this Mother's day?  I came to the conclusion, that even though I have no children to show for it yet, I am a Mother.  I am sustaining your life as your Mother.  I am providing you with shelter, nourishment, and love.  Even though we haven't met, I am still so in love with you and cannot wait to finally meet you.  We are sharing a body, and even though it's hard to see the numbers on the scale constantly increasing and to see the once toned areas of my body jiggle like jello, I enjoy this time we have together.  I hope you hear my voice and know it's the voice of your Mother.  I am your Mother and always will be. 

I pray, constantly, that I will be a good Mother.  It worries me that I don't have what it takes to raise you the right way nor to be the perfect Mom.  But I know, that there is no such thing as perfect.  I may not clean the house perfectly, cook dinner perfectly, handle the finances perfectly, or act perfectly, but I will always love you perfectly; with all of my heart.  I have gained a strong testimony of the Lord's hand in my life.  He is here and always helping your Dad and I.  We are so blessed to be a part of this Gospel and to have the knowledge that we do.  I know that through my steadfastness in prayer, scripture study, and Temple attendance, he will be there to help me in those areas that I can't make perfect on my own.  He will be satisfied with me at the end of the day when I have given it all I've got.  Even if "all I've got" consists of getting you and I showered and fed for the day.  If one day the chores go undone, he isn't going to love me any less.  He might ask that I try harder the next day, and I hope I always will.  But he will remember the good things I have done that day.

I hope these thoughts stick with you through your times of trial and tribulation.  And heaven bless you to not expect perfection from yourself.  It's impossible baby doll.  Your best is the only true "perfect".  We love you and always will.  The Lord will be there to help you and the Spirit will be there to guide you.  If you mess up along the way, we (your earthly and Heavenly parents) will be there to help you up, dust you off and to get you back on your way.  We have all been in those positions. Obviously, your Mother is a perfect example of this. But with constant effort to strengthen your relationship with your Father in Heaven and your brother Jesus Christ, you will have the protection and assistance you need to overcome your trials.  Whether they be big, small, easy or hard.  We fall, it's inevitable.  But we get back up and pray for strength to see that crack in the pavement more clearly next time.

I love you and always will.  I pray you have a wise mind, a compassionate heart, and a pure spirit.
I pray for strength in your growth and development both physically and spiritually.
May you always turn to your loving parents as well as the Lord with your questions and needs. 
We love you forever and ever.

Love,
Your Mother

Movement and Motion!

Baby Girl,

You have me on pins and needles most of the day waiting for your next kick! I am able to feel you moving around for sure now.  Now that I know it's you moving in there and not just indigestion, I realized that I probably could feel you earlier on, but was unaware of what those funny little flutters were.  Now it's as if you are teasing me! I love to feel your little kicks and movements and I wait and wait and then when I am least expecting it, you give me a little love tap.  And let me tell you, I do love it!  Daddy, on the other hand, is pretty stinkin' jealous that he can't feel you.  I always announce when you're moving around, and he runs over and presses his hand against my belly.. but then when I feel it most, he feels nothing.  We've concluded that it's just too weak for him to feel from the outside.  But I can't wait until he can enjoy your movement too!  Your first kicks that I felt for sure were on May 5th, 2012.  This is the day Daddy and I celebrated our first anniversary (because it landed on a Sunday this year).  We've had so much fun thinking about you for 20 long weeks, and in just 20 more we will get to meet you. 

In Daddy's anniversary gift basket I included a little onesie that says "Daddy's Sweetie".  It's adorable.  We are excited to spoil you! Your Grandma Michelle told me she bought you some outfits the other day.  You are gonna be so spoiled by all of your grandparents!  Keep in mind that you are the first Grandkid to my Mom and Dad, first Great Grandkid to my Grandparent's on the Ruesch and Wiser side, and the first Great Great Grandkid to Grandpa and Grandma Pug! Everyone is so excited to meet you! On Daddy's side, there are already lots of Grandkids, but you are extra special to Grandma Connie because you are her first real Grandchild.  She is already buying you toys and CD's and lots of cool things.  So, are you ready to make your debut yet or what?

I was having some very intense back pain last night and this morning when I woke up.  I stayed home from work for a couple extra hours to try and sleep it off.  I am unable to determine what is inducing the pain. I exercised yesterday so that could be the culprit, however, I am having moderate cramping too.  I am a little confused and nervous, so if you could give me some kicks today, I would greatly appreciate it.  I just worry about you all the time so I need you to let me know that you are doing well in there Sweet Pea.

This weekend is our 20 week ultrasound, that means we get to see you again! We love seeing you on the screen.  So much in fact, that your Daddy wants to buy an Ultrasound Machine.  He is a silly dude.  He just loves you.  We can't wait to learn more details about our sweet girl and get some more pictures!  Don't be shy, embrace the paparazzi!

We love you so much Sweet Nora
Love Mommy

My Baby Girl

Well baby girl, we finally know you are gonna be our sweet daughter.  Finding out this big news was by far the best birthday present mom could have ever asked for.  It was such an amazing experience to see you move and kick around inside of me.  I just love that you are so active and healthy in there.  Telling your Dad and all our friends about you was such a thrill.  I bought Daddy a cupcake with a secret filling inside... pink for a girl, and blue for a boy.  I brought it to my Birthday dinner where all of our friends were and there he took a BIG bite.  When everyone saw the pink, we all shouted "Hooray!".  We've decided to name you Nora.  We love calling you by name and planning things out for your arrival.  Your Daddy likes to cry when he thinks about his baby girl.  All I know, is that you will steal his heart and have him wrapped around your finger ... take it from a girl who has been in that same position.  Your Daddy loves to spoil, and he already confesses that he won't be able to say "No" to your shopping habits.  Sounds like you're definitely your Momma's Girl.  We love you princess.  Here are some pictures of you.  Look at how big and developed you are getting!

Your Arm

Your Foot

Your Face

You are a girl!

My precious baby girl.

It makes me giggle watching your ultrasound DVD.  You are so active! We love to watch you move around.  Seeing your little mouth swallow is amazing to me.  The other night I laid down on my tummy on the bed, soon after I realized that by laying in that position, I could feel your little kicks from the pressure on my uterus! It was so magical! Daddy even got to feel one kick before you decided to stop.  That was such a fun moment for us.  We are so in love with you Nora.  We can't wait to meet you.  But stay healthy and strong until that time comes. 

Love always

Mom

He or She?

Baby Dear,

I apologize for the lack of recent posts.  Mommy has been truly busy.  Dad and I have been working a lot and trying to save up some extra money to spoil you with! It's also Finals Week for Mom, and although it is stressful, I am so excited that the semester is over! School is good, but Mom is tired of being a full time employee, student and pregnant egg! It is a tiring life.  I am excited to have more time to spend thinking about you, talking to you, and getting ready for your arrival!  Some exciting things have happened lately that I want to tell you all about....

I've been experiencing some intense abdominal pain for the last month.  It started as just a sore feeling, but it grew into sharp pains that almost sent me home from work.  My tummy has been very sensitive to the touch and very crampy on the inside. I just shrugged it off at first, assuming it was just normal.  It started to get worse to where I could barely move at times.  I decided to call the Doctor.  Daddy and I went in to see Dr. Holmes and he took a look.  Thankfully, you are very healthy and no harm is done to you. I was very nervous that I may have hurt you.  Turns out everything is OK I was just having contractions.  The Doctor told me to stop any running or walking for exercise and to keep my walking to a minimal.  Great.  This ruins all my plans of staying fit while pregnant.  But I will do whatever it takes to keep you safe.  The next thing was exciting.. the Doctor said he thought you might be a .... are you ready? ... A GIRL!  I was very excited, even though he wasn't sure, I immediately pictured you as my little Norah Grace, swaddled in my arms.  Dad was not convinced, so he wanted me to schedule an appointment to have an official gender test done with supersonic equipment.  He is a silly guy.  That night, Daddy and I were lounging on the couch watching TV and I realized I could feel you! You felt like a little goldfish swimming around in my belly! I can't quite explain the feeling, but it felt like butterflies.  It made me so excited! Thank you, now... move more so I can feel you ALL the time!

Our appointment to find out if you are for sure our little girl or boy is tomorrow, on Mom's birthday. What a special present for me (:  I am one lucky mom and I am so excited to find out more about you!  Girl or Boy, can't wait to know so Daddy and I can start to buy you precious things.  We are so excited to meet you and can't believe we are almost half-way there! You are so special to us and we love you.  We can't wait to meet the most amazing thing that ever happened to us.  Stay healthy and strong baby boo.

Love Always,
Mama

16 Weeks

I am now 16 weeks and you are now 4.5 inches long weighing in at about 3.5 ounces! I can't believe how big you are getting! I really want you to start making some movement in there so I can feel you! I know I have about 2 more weeks for that, but maybe these butterflies are really you? I can't tell if I get butterflies just from thinking about you and how excited you make me, or if it's really you moving around like a little fish! I thought I would tell you about some of the accomplishments you have made so far! From now on you will be growing at a much quicker rate and hopefully mom will see some belly growth as a result!

Your muscles are now developing to the point that you can hold your head up in a straight line. Your facial muscles can display a variety of expressions. So go ahead and show off your cute face next time we take a look!

Your cute little fingernails are well formed and you are emptying your bladder every 40 to 45 minutes .. much like mommy! You are also covered in "lanugo", fine hairs that cover your little body. Your ears are no longer on your neck, they have moved to their proper position on your head!

Next time we see the doctor, he should be able to tell us if you are a Mrs. Ericksen or Mr. Ericksen and we just can't wait. My maternal instincts have switched from thinking you were a boy to a girl. My intuition must not be working properly. Either way, I couldn't be more excited. Your daddy and I just wanna get to know you and learn all we can about how to make you happy. We can't wait to start spoiling you so we need to know if you're a girly girl or a tom boy! We love you so much and we get more and more excited for your arrival every day!

Love always, Your Mom.

Your Body: A Gift From God

I was reading a blog today and came across a very touching and special post. I know there is no definitive answer to your gender, but I want to share this now anyway because I think it is applicable whether you are a precious boy or a sweet little girl. I hope to always remember this post and to turn back to it and read it to you as you experience tough trials and the changes of life. I hope you remember the words of this post and that no matter what, your Father and I will always love you.

Your body is such a precious gift given to you from God. It is already changing everyday and performing amazing functions. It is sustaining your life. Change is inevitable, and that's how our creator knew it would be. He finds beauty in our growth and development. Your dad and I also find beauty in your growth and development as we see the change and progresses that you make daily.

In today's world and society, there is a much distorted portrayal of women and their beauty. We can no longer see the natural beauty in ourselves and frequently, in others as well. We have disconnected with our spirits and our "us" that Jesus and Heavenly Father love so much. The medias depictions of what women look like are false. They are artificially "beautified". They want you to think that you have to be skinny, sexy, and gorgeous. But the truth is, you are gorgeous. You don't need to be skinny to be beautiful. You are perfect just the way your Father in Heaven made you; the way your earthly parents love and adore you. It's hard growing up in this society, but you are strong. Remember these words. True beauty comes from within. It comes from showing the light of Christ and serving those around you. It comes from wearing your smile and dressing modestly. It comes from sharing your testimony and having confidence and integrity. I grew up with low self-esteem and had a very poor image of myself and my body. When I got engaged to your Dad, I was afraid of what he would think of me when he would see me without make-up on. I later realized, that your Dad saw my natural beauty and taught me that I was and am still beautiful. I am so blessed to be married to your Dad because he knows and sees my true beauty, even more than I do and he reminds me of it every single day. He loves me with or without makeup, dressed-up or in sweats, pregnant and chubby, he loves me the same. He doesn't expect me to be like the women in magazines, he knows that those are false portrayals of a woman. We pray that you will also find a worthy spouse one day that will remind you either of your own true beauty, or the true beauty of a woman. I want to read these words to you often so you always remember that you are beautiful and you don't need to compromise any of your happiness to become what you see in the media. We love you so much.

Your body houses a spirit.


The spirit changes constantly with intelligence and progression.


Your body will change with your spirit, constantly.


On days where you will feel heavy, emotionally, so will your body.


On days where you feel energetic, emotionally, so will your body.


Your body will change like the earth changes, and if you are quiet you will feel the earth's changes in your own body. And like the earth, your body is cyclic. This system of cycles is very important for your body and spirit, it will pull out dark, deep-seated emotions that might hurt you --even if you're not conscious of them-- and flush them out, literally out of your body and out of your mind.

This cycle that will occur in your body is Grace.


Allow yourself to be cyclic. And feel cyclic.


You will be tempted to coerce your body into staying the same. You might hear about unhealthy perimeters to keep your body within; numbers and measurements. You might feel a need to restore your body to a certain age where you think your body belongs--even though you would never will your spirit backwards to that same place. You will hear lies that unless your body stays the same you are not good enough.


These are the worst lies ever told since the beginning of time. The worst lies always involve a woman's body. They always involve a woman's body and her inabilities. And these lies, they've hurt a lot of people. You don't have to believe them. In fact, you can believe more than the sum of all these lies.

Your body is not about what you have too much of. Your body is not about what you wish you had more of. Your body isn't even about an appearance, it's more intelligent than that. It's about truth; the physical manifestation of what you know inside.

It's not about what days you will take it to the gym. It's not about what you foods you will refuse it. It's not about how you can pluck it, paint it, or shape it with plastic. It's about how you feel about its worth--and your spirit's worth--and those sentiments will be your guide on how you treat it.


Your body has been changing since the day you were born, let it continue to change. Let it fatten, let it thin, let it bloom, let it blossom, let it shrink, let it wrinkle, let it die.


And celebrate it all.

Remember these words always as you grow and change. Remember that you are beautiful because you are a child of your Heavenly Father. We love you and look forward to all your growth and change in life.

Love, Mom

April 2, 2012

Your ultrasound went great! Your little heart was beating so strong! Good for you baby! Since it was going so fast (150 BPM) I tend to think maybe you are a little girl?.. Am I right? The sad news is we won't find out for 4 more weeks until your 18 week ultrasound! But after that, things are just gonna fly by I feel.
This past weekend was General Conference. How beautiful it was. We were able to watch all 4 sessions and even got to attend the Conference Center for Sunday Afternoon session. Thanks to your Grandma Connie for being in the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and getting us great tickets! There was so much to learn about parenting in all the sessions. So many amazing talks were given and I am thankful for the spirit and the answers to my prayers for wonderful messages. How they all knew that I was needing their talks is beyond me. Dad and I were very surprised at how all the talks seemed to be applicable in our lives today. Conference is so special. When we were at the session, we all stood as President Thomas S. Monson entered the room, I cannot explain the spirit I felt as he and the rest of the first presidency came in. I became overwhelmed and began to find tears filling my eyes. I am so happy and so blessed to be apart of this gospel. As your mom, I want you to know that I know I am nowhere near perfect, but that through the atonement, and with the help of the Lord, I can become more like him. I want to be a perfect mother and I promise I am going to give it my all. I promise to try my best and always keep the Lord amongst our relationships. He will help me to help you in all things. I cannot wait to meet you little bug. Love you so much. Stay strong!

Love Always,
Momma